We found out last week that our eldest little monkey has received a place in the primary school that was our first choice.
It was a day of mixed emotions.
Relief came first. We were relieved that he has gotten a place at a school that we think will be wonderful for him. An extra dose of relief came when we discovered some of the children he already knows from pre-school etc have also got a place in said school.
Then came excitement. On my part this was. I have very fond memories of my primary school and am excited about all the new things the little man will get to experience and the friends he will make along the way.
A sense of being underwhelmed was next. We don't expect the little man to understand the concept of 'big school', we are starting to talk about it more with him so it doesn't come as a complete shock. At the moment he is not really interested in anything regarding school. I don't expect this to change until September has come and gone.
Then the nervousness hit. Our little guy despite having gone to nursery since he was one still gets upset when separating from us. He is much better now that he ever has been and he's absolutely fine once he gets on with playing or having his breakfast at pre-school. However, I am rather nervous about how he is going to be when he realises he is going to be dropped of at school every day. I have visions of me attempting to get a screaming child into the building whilst pushing his brother in the buggy and trying to retain some kind of dignity! I am going to remain optimistic that this wont happen and he'll go to school with no problems. I know children pick up on nerves from parents so I have banished them deep within!
On the evening of finding out about the school allocation when all was calm and the boys were both asleep, the feelings of sadness and loss kicked in. I found myself standing over the kitchen sink with my rubber gloves on bawling my eyes out while my husband looked on in complete bewilderment possibly thinking that I had finally lost the plot. I know babies don't stay babies forever but I honestly could never have comprehended just how quickly they grow up. It doesn't seem like two minutes ago when our eldest was learning to walk and couldn't say many words. Now he scales the climbing walls on the park and randomly tells me he has changed my name to poo head.
I am making the executive decision to never let boy number two grow up. What am I going to be like when he starts school? With all the problems he had when he was born seeing him walk into the school gates dressed in his little uniform with his bag over his shoulder just might be too much pride/emotion to handle!